Why did they say that?

You’re watching TV, scrolling through social media, reading the papers, or engaged in a debate, and someone says something that is:

• provocative or inflammatory
• racist, extremist, or sacrilegious
• a lie

Why did they say that?

Tempting as it may be to answer “They’re crazy” or “They’re ignorant,” there may be strategic reasons why they said it.

They said it to see how people react.

As the speakers sees it:

• The people who agree with them are their allies;
• The people who disagree with them are their enemies; and
• The people who sit and say nothing are pushovers.

Liars, provocateurs, and narcissists don’t think in terms of “right/wrong” or “true/false”: There is only People On My Side and People Who Are Against Me. Seeing people’s reactions to an outrageous statement or a lie is a shorthand way of finding out who is in what category.

If the majority of listeners say nothing, agree, or applaud, the liar may be emboldened to make their next lie even bigger or more brazen.

They said it because they like how saying it makes them feel.

To some people, how they feel is more important than facts, truth, or fairness. Saying something inflammatory, invidious, or hurtful — or getting away with a lie — makes them feel powerful, in control, smart, and superior.

Saying provocative things also gets the speaker attention, and it doesn’t matter if the attention is howls of protest or reasoned counter-arguments. People who crave attention need reassurance that they exist and are worth listening to, so they will say anything to get attention.

They said it to make it true.

Unfortunately, the more times you repeat a statement, the more credible you can appear.

People who speak the truth think they only have to say the true thing once — like a math equation: Q.E.D., there it is. But people who lie will repeat their lies and even pound the table and yell or start to cry, because they know that people listening tend to be more persuaded by tantrums than by calm reason.

Tantrums make a forceful impression. Reasoned arguments, in contrast, can be longer, difficult to follow, and hard to remember.

Liars know, too, that most of their audience will not take the time to investigate the facts: They’ll just repeat what they heard someone say (perhaps so they too can feel powerful, smart, and in control). And so the lie, through repetition and dissemination, becomes accepted as truth.

They said it to distract you.

According to folklore, if a vampire is chasing you, you should throw handfuls of salt on the ground. The vampire is compelled, as if by an obsessive-compulsive disorder, to count each grain of salt — by which time, you’ve made your escape.

Similarly, liars spread lies, half-truths, and misstatements all over the place, knowing that people who live by the light of reason will stop and disprove every lie they encounter. Truth-seekers can’t resist disproving a lie — by which time, the liar has successfully moved on to the next lie, and the next one.

In the end, understanding why someone said or did something helps you to determine what you want your response to be — whether it’s agreeing, disagreeing, or saying nothing.

But beware: People who chronically lie, provoke, or make outrageous statements want to be dismissed and ignored by people of intelligence and virtue. That frees them up to do their work without interruption, censure, criticism, or consequences.

Tim Lemire is a published author and visual artist. His website is timlemire.com.